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  1. 1. The Calcium Kid: ka-Bloomie Reviews

    • Loved it. Orlando was cute, the movie was hilarious.
      30
    • Liked it. Orlando was cute, the movie was enjoyable.
      43
    • OK. Orlando was cute, the movie so-so.
      7
    • Feh. Orlando was cute, but the movie wasn't all that great.
      3
    • Ugh. Orlando was cute, but that's the ONLY redeeming quality of the film.
      2
    • REALLY Ugh. The movie sucked. Yes, Orlando was cute, but really screwed the pooch here. (Definition: Messed up BIG time.)
      1


88 posts in this topic

CK_Prod13.jpg

OK, UK ka-Bloomies, we want your reviews. They can be short and sweet, or long and flowing. You can vote without comment if you like.

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Guest groovychick

Loved it. Jimmy is so cute :wub: and Orlando was brilliant :boxing: . I'm going to go off and watch it again now.

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Saw it this morning and loved it. Jimmy was such a sweet character and Orlando, as usual, was gorgeous.

emmy

x

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Guest Aroreiel

I saw it on my own this morning. It wasn't brilliant, but it was sweet, funny, very enjoyable in my opinion. A lot better than what the critics seem to think. I don't think that they get that the stereotypical characters in this film, are done on purpose. It's a 'mock' take on them. Silly critics. :rolleyes:

Orlando played the sweet, vulnerable character so well. I felt so sorry for him everytime he got a clout on the head, and that's not even from the boxing either! Poor guy. I just wanted to take him in my arms and cuddle him. It was great to see Orlando in this simpler role. He did great! I thought Jimmy's best mate Stan was funny too, and Paddy ("Johnny"). :lol:

I'm too worried to go into detail, in case of spoilers. So I'll leave it at that for now. I'm going to see it again either Monday or Wednesday, with my friend who's eager to see Orlando too. I can't wait!

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This does not contains any plot spoilers.

I just saw it this evening with my daughter. There were 15 of us in the cinema, and the tiniest of screens, and it's on at only one of the 3 multiplexes in town. I don't think TPTB are expecting it to do much.

Well, rather unexpectedly, I enjoyed it! I was so pessimistic about crappy British comedies, that I almost didn't want to go, Orlando notwithstanding. But as Aroreiel said , the cringe making characters and situations were deliberately meant to be that way, so that changed my whole view of it. There are some very funny moments, and I cracked up quite a few times.

Orlando was very, very good. I was once again able to lose myself in his character, and forget the man himself. Jimmy doesn't have much of an "arc" , but Orlando sees it's development through perfectly. I can't praise him enough. (Ok, so I'm a little biased.) Very interesting to see Legolas and Will flash across his face once or twice. He plays the comedy very well; some of his looks to camera are priceless.

There are a couple of excellent performances from Mr Bush the manager, and Pete Wright, and the best friend is good too. I don't know why Billie Piper has had so much exposure over this - she has almost nothing to say. Ronnie Ancona plays Jimmy's mum as a slapper version of her Posh Beckham impersonation. I didn't like Paddy at all - that actor has played the same character in everything I've seen him in down the years. He was the flaw for me.

Orlando without his shirt is well worth the wait, even if it doesn't last long enough. I was strangely affected by his running - something very sexy about it, don't know why. :ph34r:

I really liked the soundtrack too, though I'll never be able to sing the national anthem again.

Anyways, I could sit through the film again, no problem.

I would have voted, but I looked at the results first and then found I couldn't . Silly me. :blush: I would have gone for the second one.

MM

(And if that wasn't enough, they showed the full Troy trailer before it ! :w00t: First time I've seen it on the big screen. Paris is simply to die for . :faint: Yippee! It's MAY tomorrow! )

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Thanks guys! It's good to read some nice reviews. Critics can really be harsh and biting sometimes :blink: Unfortunately I don't think Calcium Kid will be releasing here so I'll have to wait for DVD/video.

Keep the reviews coming!

Cheers

CC :meow:

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How many times did he say the "f" word? :w00t:

Orlando? Not once! Jimmy wouldn't. He just about said sh*t once. I think that the only one who did say f :censor: was the Pete Wright character, and he couldn't open his mouth without saying it .

I was hoping to hear Orlando say it too. Can't think why. :paperbag:

Jaks

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Guest Aroreiel

I just had to reply. I can't stop thinking about this film and I haven't really had anyone to rave with about it. I hope this reply is okay.

.I don't know why Billie Piper has had so much exposure over this - she has almost nothing to say

I totally agree! She didn't do much really. But she is one lucky lass for a couple of little scenes in particular. :wink:

Orlando without his shirt is well worth the wait, even if it doesn't last long enough. I was strangely affected by his running - something very sexy about it, don't know why.

Awww yes!...and you could see his scar too. Bless him. He did look very gorgeous with his shirt off. His running also captivated me too. Seeing those legs in action. Wow!

I really liked the soundtrack too, though I'll never be able to sing the national anthem again.

:lol: Those dancers were soooo bad. But I loved the song played during the end credits. It's by Shaznay Lewis of 'All Saints' but I can't remember the name of it now. :unsure: (Yes, I stayed through the credits :tomato: )

The first scene of him in his bed? :whistle: .And I think Jimmy said the 'S' word a couple of times. Funny to hear him say that too. Computer says 'no'.

The 'Troy' trailer didn't play in my screening. But as I went into see CK, I heard the music from the 'Troy' trailer playing in the screening next to me, and instantly stuck my ear to the door and listened through the WHOLE thing. Anyone that came past me would've probably thought I was wierd. :blink: I couldn't help it.

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Orlando? Not once! Jimmy wouldn't. He just about said sh*t once.

Oh well, :censor: it. Guess we'll just have to wait for Haven. :lol:

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For those who have seen it --

Just how embarrassing is that scene where Jimmy gets caught doing something of a rather, er, personal nature in the morning?

To me, the descriptions have sounded like something that would make me want to hide under my theater seat, but maybe that's just the American in me talking. We Yanks can be a tad inhibited sometimes. :paperbag:

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Just how embarrassing is that scene where Jimmy gets caught doing something of a rather, er, personal nature in the morning? 

Shh ! Shhh! Don't give away the funny bits! :lol: I was trying not to say anything about that! :whistle: That's one of the scenes that cracked me up!

(Yes, I stayed through the credits  )

Ummm Auroreiel, so did I. :blush: ( last to leave the room.)

MM, I want to see it with you! You are a hoot!!

Why thank you MB ! I'm a bitch too. :shiny: You should have seen my comments about a certain slapper dolly bird, but I self-edited on that one. :zip:

If you find yourself near Bath in the next week, or near Hull at any time thereafter I would be glad to accompany you to another viewing. Though I don't expect you to cross any oceans. :hug:

Jaks

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I'm going to go off and watch it again now.

Yeah, yeah.rub it in why don't ya'.

Just kidding. :hug:

I'm glad to hear some positive things about the movie. With the way the critics have been bashing it, I'm afraid that it won't do very well in the theaters. Someone please go for me! I wish that I could be on that side of the Atlantic to go myself, but I'm afraid Hubby just wouldn't understand me charging a plane ticket, just to go see a movie. I don't know why.he just wouldn't. :rolleyes:

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Guest Aroreiel

I live at this thread.

Just how embarrassing is that scene where Jimmy gets caught doing something of a rather, er, personal nature in the morning?

:lmao: Erm, yeah.it is quite.

No details! :wink:

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Guest Sue31

I enjoyed the film more than I thought I would, and it just enforces my negative opinions of film critics who only like woman-hating, bloodsoaked rubbish. :rant:

Orlando really shined as Jimmy and the emotions he managed to wring out of the character were amazing. Jimmy is so lovable and when his world starts to fall apart I wanted to slap Herbie the manager. I was beaming when it was all resolved happily. I took my sister and she liked the film too.and she's pretty hard to please!!!

Having said that it was lovely to see Omid get to play someone other than "scum bag Arab no 2" (as he noted in an interview), and Ralph Spall was great as the crude friend with "anger management problems".

And yes, I agree, there is something so damn sexy about Orlando just running.and running.getting faster and faster.sigh. :faint:

As for the noises Jimmy makes under that duvet.they have to be heard to be believed.

Hoping to see it again

Sue

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Guest Barbara

I saw it last night with my daughter and a couple of her friends and we all enjoyed it. Orlando's performance was very good; to echo what has already been said, he was totally believeable and didn't find myself watching him as anything other than Jimmy.

Just for fun, during the scene right at the end of the movie - and those who have seen it will know the scene I mean - the girl behind me said, "She's sooooo lucky!" or words to that effect! That made me smile too.

I am really looking forward to see what Orlando does with the character of Paris now.

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Guest elfdancr426
And yes, I agree, there is something so damn sexy about Orlando just running.and running.getting faster and faster.sigh. :faint:

As for the noises Jimmy makes under that duvet.they have to be heard to be believed.

OH MY.

Noises beneath the covers!? Orlando going faster and faster!?!?!?!?!

Sue, your name is now on my death certificate. Or at least on my criminal record, because your post has rendered me homicidal. I would kill to see this. Oh. My. God.

I pray to the Almighty, no moaning from that man during the Troy love scenes. :ph34r:

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I saw it yesterday (my birthday!) with my husband. Since it isn't showing at our local Odeon, we travelled 10 miles to the UCI at Basildon, and the first nice sight that greeted me was two Troy posters in the foyer, one of the Trojan horse, and the other of Paris and Helen kissing - so our visit was off to a good start.

Then we got to see the latest, longest Troy trailer before the film - which has just whetted my appetite for that even more.

As it was an afternoon performance, there were very few people there, a few teenage girls and a group of teenage lads, but everyone enjoyed CK and laughed in all the right places. The boys were actually quite funny as they were sitting just behind us and before the feature began they were discussing other films; they were all very down on Titanic, but then one admitted that he cried when he saw the Lion King and another said that HE'D cried during Bambi - so they were obviously quite sensitive for young lads :)

Anyway, on to the film itself. I thought it was excellent, much, MUCH better than the trailer had led me to expect. Orlando was brilliant, he wasn't playing a part, he WAS Jimmy, who was the sweetest, most lovable young man you can imagine. His expressions were spot-on as he tried to deal with all the confusing things that were happening to him, and I'll freely admit that I cried when everything started going wrong, When Jimmy said 'I just want my old life back', it was quite heartbreaking. The film was very much on his shoulders, and he carried the weight admirably. I would say it required more acting than any of his previous roles - and I can't think of a single other actor who could have brought Jimmy to life the way Orlando did.

Which is not to say that the rest of the cast were bad. (Apologies for using charcter names here, I can't remember all the cast) Some of them - notably Herbie Bush, Jimmy's manager - were excellent; he and Jimmy reacted very well to each other. Pete Wright was OTT, but then he was supposed to be. Good performances also from Paddy - though that was very much a caricature - and Jimmy's dad. Billie Piper's role as Angel was tiny, but she played it well, Jimmy's expression when she asked if she could have her knockers back was priceless. Rafe Spall as Jimmy's mate Stan had the character down, but for me I felt that his accent was just a little forced (Orlando's Sarf Lunnon accent was spot-on, as was the Irish accent he adopted for a very sweet scene just before the big fight was due to take place). The one performance I felt was not up to scratch was that of Ronnie Ancona as Jimmy's mother.

Have to give praise to the Westlife wannabees with their version of the National anthem - with Herbie dancing alongside them - which was both painful to watch (as it was meant to be) and very very funny. Also to Frank Bruno and Chris Eubank for being completely and utterly themselves in their cameos.

Some of my favourite scenes: Jimmy's morning 'exercise' before he realised the camera was on him; his visit to his old school, watching him wake up on the morning of the big fight, his very emotional visit with his father, who helped him get things sorted out in his head, and the touching pre-fight scene with Jimmy, Paddy and Stan. Not to forget his absolute terror when he realised he'd become the darliing of the National Front!

For me, the somewhat dodgy camera work and documentary style worked very well. And the twist in the plot made it much more interesting than if it had been the Rocky clone some reviewers seemed to expect. However, it's NOT a film that will translate well to other countries, and might have been better received here had it been made as a tv-movie. But I, for one, thoroughly enjoyed it, and would give it an A.

(Husband also thought it was excellent - recommended it to everyone at his workplace last night!)

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Guest groovychick
Just how embarrassing is that scene where Jimmy gets caught doing something of a rather, er, personal nature in the morning?

I could not watch that scene! :blush: But I could hear the noises loud and clear! :paperbag: It was very funny.

Orlando's performance was very good.. he was totally believeable and didn't find myself watching him as anything other than Jimmy.

Yeah I agree with you on that Barbara. I didn't see any of Orlando's characters or even Orlando himself in Jimmy. I think it made his performance all the more better.

Although I did find his acting a little bit rusty in the beginning (it kind of reminded me of my younger sister - who, my God REALLY sounds like him - acting in a school play) but the more the film went on, the more I got comfortable watching him. He got better and better by the end that I now can't doubt his acting ability.

I enjoyed the film very much on the whole, and I left with this great feel good factor prompting this goofy ear-to-ear grin on my face all the way home. The other guys in the film were very good also Omid was just hilarious and Ralph Spall's Stan was just mad. Although Billie Piper in the end scene did get a huge "Ewwww!" From the more louder Orlando fans in the back (it was a really small cinema) and yes I admit to joining in.

Orlando was hot and I don't know why there is something so damn sexy about him just running Sue31, I agree with you on that. Some points he looked like he was just having fun. I liked the bit when he had to visit his old school. How real did that look? Kinda scared me from the amount of times Orlando's hurt his head. Oh and of course I loved the last boxing match, damn he looked good!

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Guest Aroreiel
Just for fun, during the scene right at the end of the movie - and those who have seen it will know the scene I mean - the girl behind me said, "She's sooooo lucky!" or words to that effect!  That made me smile too. 

I am really looking forward to see what Orlando does with the character of Paris now.

Oh, I know what you mean! That little glint in his eye when he looks at the camera? I just about sparked out there. :faint:

I said to myself as I came out of the screening. "Seen Jimmy. Now bring on Paris!" :wink:

And you know, it wasn't just the little noises that got me.it was what he said. :smoke: I had my hand over my mouth in the shock, the whole time. :lmao:

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Thank you all for your comments! I want to say a particular welcome and thank you to Aniethen for her thorough and thoughtful review. Hope you enjoy yourself here!

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A review of Calcium Kid-Wishfulthinkin

My first thought as the film commenced was that I was a little unsure of how I would find it…It turned out to be a bit of a shock really.. But in a good way.

A Quirky, British comedy that I found charming and humorous until the very end.

It’s obvious from the beginning it’s tongue in cheek humour. The very “Morning glory” sequence starts of the trend. Oscar film it’s not. Bloody funny Mockumentary it is.

His accent is spot on and you really feel for his character. (And for the amount he is smacked round the head). I don’t want to post so much and am writing a full review up elsewhere. Those who want to see it (spoilers included) can contact me.

All I can say is.. I personally thought it was a classic, quirky, hilarious piece of filming. All be it amateur, that was the POINT…. the way the characters acted had a POINT. A point most reviewers seem clearly to have missed. It’s a shame people don’t take a gamble and see it themselves before listening to the reviewers.

And Orlando getting angry? Just go and watch it. It was a brilliant piece of filming, 100% believable, 100% pure talent… My respect for him had heightened yet again.

So I’ll sum up with the words from SNEAK (UK ) magazines review (4/5 stars):

“This movie ‘s no “The Lord of the Rings” or “Pirates”… but then again, it’s not meant to be!”

x Claire x

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Guest Tattoochris

I am hopipng to see it this weekend and my 12 year old daughter is also desperate to see it. Apart form the morning scene.is there anything else that she should not really see? Those of you who have seen the film ,what are your thoughts about her going? I know she is under the official age, but she hears bad language at school everyday! I know her friends have all been into 15 films without any problem.

Or should I wait for the DVD?

Thanks!

Chris

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Guest groovychick

I brought along my 13 year old sister to watch Calcium Kid and I think it was fine for her. Of course the morning glory bit was quite awkward, but in the film you don't see anything really bad. Yes, the swearing is quite intense from Pete Wright's character, but as you said, it doesn't seem to be a problem with younger generations today unfortunatley. So that's it really but I do remember there was one bit where Stan's holding up a topless page 3 model to the camera and it focuses on it for a while. Apart from that I think everything is fine.

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